Before I get into my story, you’re probably thinking, is reading this worth my time. Well, I’d say so and I’d start by letting you know what brought me here.

For years I have felt alone, even when surrounded by many, I felt even more alone than being alone. For years I felt that yes, I have a purpose, but the world itself, the unfair and unjust circumstances many find themselves in and the mere idea that I cannot do anything much about it, kept me in my shell. The disbelieve in myself lead to conditioning the negativity in my mind thus affecting my external being. I found myself alone and yes, I have friends, but at the end of the day, I still felt I only had myself.

The idea of starting a blog has been pondering in my mind for over a year. What made me finally start it, is my second attempt at overdosing on pills. I somehow managed, both times, to play it off cool around my family while being out of my mind drugged. But apparently not enough to end my life. Being the person who I am, I don’t like showing weakness aside from vulnerability, especially not to my mother.

The second time, I found myself in between the numbness, seeking a way to get out. I asked myself what will come from this but more sadness and heart-break beside my own pain? I then made a deal with myself that I try, I try to get out of this by calling someone and if they don’t answer, then that’s my sign to go. And I bet you get the rest.

My point is, many of us go through this and many of us don’t make it through it. We read stories about depression yet don’t make much out of it unless it’s someone we know. Instead, we see the prettiest guys and girls with the make-up and hair ‘on fleek’, keeping up with their lives as a daily ritual and thinking how’d they get it so easy. What about those around you struggling? The world can change so easily, but to change a mind-set, is like building a rocket and I’m pretty sure even rocket scientists can’t figure that out either.

But I promise it starts with you. It starts within you. And right now, I’m putting what is in me on paper, hoping someone else can find comfort in not being alone.